...Maybe It's Yesterday, I Done Forgot!

It's nearly the end of October and it's been a slightly less full on month than usual, so this post should be short. Should be.

October kicked off with a very exciting health check. These infamous Japanese health checks that every public servant must take every year come in a large variety of shapes and sizes. Some involve stripping off in front of pervy Japanese men, other involve swallowing disgusting liquids and having x-rays taken, some even involve electrodes put all over your body that send an electric current through you. Some can even experience all of these exciting things, like my friend Jen in Ine, but in Maggie, Nishihara-san and my case, all we got the basic “one, two, three now get the hell out” special. They take place in large halls, usually a town hall and they have you move from station to station like a cow going through the slaughterhouse, at each stop someone taking a piece of you off. The first test involved a nice Japanese man with lollies telling me to take off my bra in the back of a bus. OK the lollies part was a lie, but I wish it wasn't. Yup, it was the x-ray. It was over pretty fast so it wasn't as bad as Jen's horror stories. Next, luckily, came the urine test because I had been holding on all morning and was desperate. I had drunk so much water beforehand when I found out the was no western toilets the in hall and I can't go in Japanese toilets unless I'm busting. After you pee in the little paper cup, you then leave the toilet with cup in hand, walk through the hall full of people, cut through the line of other motionless cows and hand it over – with everyone looking on. Luckily all the water I had drunk just made it look like I was holding a cup of water. Next was the blood pressure test where I had to put my arm in large vacuum-like device for ages, while it sucked life out of me. After this came the video game station, or the vision test. Here you look down a microscope and hold a little joystick while watching a circle in the lens that has a chunk taken out of it. In which direction the chunk has been taken out you have to move the joystick in that direction. I'll been playing these sorts of games since I was little so I was pro at it with 20/20 points. I found that the older people weren't very good at it but you can't blame them – they're not electronic natives like we are, although I don't understand Maggie's score. She plays a lot of games but she didn't do very well at this. N00b. Next was a check over by the doctor who was kind of good at English. He didn't do a hell of a lot, just sort of poked and prodded for a couple of seconds while he talked about Adelaide after he heard I was from New Zealand. He soon quietened after I told him the fact that Adelaide is actually in Australia (surprise, surprise!). Finally, came the hearing test which involved listening to sounds in headphones (something else I spend a lot of time doing, so I was pretty pro at that, too).

That afternoon Maggie had spotted tents being put up on her way from the junior high school so she rushed home to tell me “We've got crepes!” In Miyazu we have no crepes. Our hunt for crepes began in Kyoto, but we lucked out there too, it seems Japan, the land flowing with crepes isn't that at all. They're actually a rare specimen that only emerge at festivals. So the appearance of the elusive crepe meant just that – it was festival time! This was the Yawarabi or lantern festival that Miyazu holds every year, that Maggie and I contributed to their marketing piece on Miyazu TV. We headed to the last sighting of the crepes and, lo and behold, there they were in their creamy goodness, so we bought some banana chocolates ones along with some mochi (rice cakes) and butaman (Chinese pork buns). That was dinner sorted. The Yawarabi Festival consisted of the streets of Miyazu being lit up with lanterns made of soda bottles with sand in the bottom and tealight candles placed on the sand. We met Nishihara-san and her two daughters Momoka and Haruka at the preschool which had one of the most impressive lantern displays down a long series of steps. 

It's a long walk to the top, but the lighting's sufficient.

We moved on and saw Noriko from the drinking party the week before who was at the information desk handing out maps and guiding people and looking bored out of her tree so we stopped by to say hi. She pointed out the places housing lanterns which happened to be all of the temples and shrines the the small area around the junior high school, and I couldn't believe how many there were. The area was less than a kilometre square and yet it had 12 temples and shrines jammed into it. Needless to say you see one, you've seen them all. It was very nice to walk around the grounds as each temple had arranged their lanterns into different patterns and shapes from kanji characters to the shape of Amanohashidate. 

Oh, real mature Priest-san.

At some temples they invited you in to check out some of the relics and old literature they house in glass cases, and they let me go up close to the golden alters to take photos. 

Gold!

At some shrines they had live music performances from a local jazz group and a local pop singer who we've heard at every gathering and are getting a bit sick of her one or two songs. We didn't stay too long as Maggie wasn't feeling too flash, so after buying more festival food we headed home. We didn't go to all of the temples and shrines but we did try.

The next afternoon saw the start of the Miyazu Cultural Festival, another annual event, but as I found out when I rocked up to the Opera House, this one was for the oldies. It ran over the Saturday and the Sunday and was a showcase of traditional music and dance from around the area and I felt a little out of place being the youngest person there. The first half of the afternoon was the traditional music portion with kimono-clad women and hakama-clad men playing in ensembles of the shamisen (three string guitar, which I'm starting lessons for next week), shakuhachi (bamboo flute, which I've been taking lessons in for a couple of weeks at Yoro Primary along with the principal) and koto (floor harp).

Women on the shamisen and the koto.

There was also a few single dancers who did narrative dances as a singer sung the story. I never understood the stories but the costumes were great.

A woman playing the part of a man.

A family of dancers.

For the second portion of the first day, it was the very showy dance troops and enka singers. The dance troops had come from several different prefectures and some did traditional comedic dances in traditional working kimono and head scarves while some did very modern takes on traditional dance. The enka singers were of course OTT as usual. On TV every week there is usually enka shows where female singers wear gaudy ball-gowns on a stage dripping with lights and tacky imagery and sing traditional Japanese pop music, which involves a lot of accordion music for some reason. There were three enka singers and although they had great voices I still find enka pretty bizarre.

The amazing stage drop curtain showing a scene of the lanterns
floating around the bay during the Obon festival. This thing was handmade and was HUGE!

Finally, as evening was falling, the most bizarre group of the day got up on stage, a group of about 18 old women and one man in their long frilly embroidered skirts or black billowy pants and smocked and embroidered shirts. These were the Miyazu Folk Dancers and they did folk dances from England, Sweden, Germany and Russia. Because there was only one man in the group, many of the women had to dress as men to dance with a partner. They did the dances well but for some reason I just found it too bizarre.

So that was the first half of October. Tune in next time for the Amanoshidate Kimono Festival or How To Really Annoy Your Japanese Hosts. Oyasumi (goodnight)!

Maybe It's Tomorrow, And Maybe It's Not...

For some unknown reason I only get colds in the middle of summer. Kyoto being the hottest prefecture in the country, it was bound to happen here, too. So it's 30°C or so and I'm sneezing my face off while the staff around me give me a wide berth like I've come in from a leper colony to teach their kids. I know I'm supposed to wear a surgical mask at times like these, but I just don't want to. So for the last week I'm been up to not much. The typhoon I mentioned n my last post has disappeared like it never happened. The three days of school that were cancelled because of it seem like they off on a holiday rather than rain because it's sunny again, the only change being the days are no longer sweltering, just pleasant. So here's the sunny September update since It's the first BOE day in a while and I can't be assed writing this at home.

Yesterday (Thursday 29 September) one of my schools, Yoshizu Primary, held an international day and invited Maggie, Rob, the AET from Yosano, Natalie, two Philipino mothers of Yoshizu children and I to teach a class each a game from our countries. Maggie and I were in charge of the 3^rd and 4^th graders that were combined. We headed outside to first play a couple of Japanese the kids taught us, then Maggie and I introduced them to 'wink murder' under the slightly censored name of 'sandman'. Nishihara-san had suggested we change the dying into sleeping as that may not appeal to the kids. I found this really odd. The kids are exposed to death all the time from the sort of anime they watch on TV, but even so they refuse to play at death. I remember we used to like this game especially because of the melodramatics we could perform as we died, but the kids here were contented enough to play at sleeping and snore loudly. After the games we had lunch with our class and as I walked in, I saw they had made a welcome big poster.

Welcome, Ali-sensei!

They had further pulled out the stops for the foreigners by having a very unusually tasty school lunch of fried fish and rice with a nice furikake on top. After coffee in the principal's office we were driven home. The day took under several hours, a usual day for me, my fellow AETs were miffed to hear. I don't think I could cut an 8.30 to 4.15 day like they do. Doing more than four periods a day? Gotta be joking. Today I was at Kamimiyazu Primary and this morning they asked for me to come in around 10.30 to do two classes, have lunch, then get dropped off at home. Life is good. :)

Last week (Thursday 22 September) was the birthday party of a fellow AET, Mario, in Omiya. I don't really know many of the other AETs in the Tango area, just the ones that started this year with me, so I went along to drink, basically. Maggie and I took the train to Omiya and began the great hike in the general direction of the bad instructions we were given. On the way as we headed into the countryside we passed a semi-shady looking woman with a man on the street and as we walked on they drove up beside us and the woman spoke up in a very American English accent, “If you have time please come and help me practice my English” and gave us her business card. Her name was Chimama (or Hoochimama, as we now know her as), and the business card she gave us was under the business name of something odd that I can’t remember. But this name rang a bell for Maggie as this place had two names, although she couldn't place it until it was mentioned to the other AETs at the party. This place was a strip joint under the name of Manopause. So Hoochimama worked at Manopause and wanted English practice. Next time we're in Omiya we thought we should drop by, it's nice to meet new interesting people. 

The party itself was held at an izakaya so there was just endless finger food and drinks they kicked us out at midnight. The birthday boy Mario is a third year AET living with his partner Matt who is also an AET. We didn't really see either of them as there were a ton of people there spread out over two long tables and we were jammed in like sardines so it was hard to move around, but the hosts did try to get around everyone they could. Highlight of the evening probably was the existence of bourbon and this was the first time I had seen it in Japan. It was no Jim Beam but it was nice to have it for the first time in a long while. After dinner we headed out to karaoke and rented a giant room, singing drunken Lady Gaga ballads until the staff threw us out at 2am. Well, I'll say you haven't seen real karaoke until you've seen four drunk gay guys singing Born This Way, complete with dance moves at two in the morning. 

"I'm on the right track baby I was born this way!"

Luckily Maggie and I were able to get a ride back to Miyazu afterwards because all of the trains had finished their runs long before. Luckily the day after, which was a Friday, was was national holiday (Autumnal Equinox Day, yeah, it's actually a holiday) so here goes the second long weekend this week! And because I've had two days off because of the typhoon, it means that I've only worked half a day this week. Otsukaresama deshita!

Group hug!

On Sunday (25 September), Miyazu hosted a regional soft volleyball tournament where we saw over 20 teams from around Kinki converge on our home grounds and compete in a goodwill competition. There were only two of our teams that competed but we meet people from as far away as Fukuchiyama and as north as Kyotango with most teams being comprised of people our age and some teams of mothers. For the record, I suck at volleyball and see myself as more of a hindrance than a help so I wasn't expecting much from me or my team. That premonition was bang on. My team played three games and we didn't win any matches but we at least won a set which extended a game into the third set instead of the usual two we played. It was still really fun though. During lunch I met a really nice guy from Fukuchiyama called Junji who had just returned home from spending five years in Seattle. As expected his English was excellent and it was a welcome change to speak English to a Japanese person after all the Japanese I have to speak all of the time. This was the first time my team mates had heard me speak English so we had an audience every time we spoke. I met his team and introduced them to mine, and we played a couple of games together in the off time. We all got along so well that we are planning a meet up with them again sometime for a practice together and a dinner and karaoke night out in Fukuchiyama. Even though I suck at volleyball I think my team mates like having me on the team for the comedy aspect. It's not so much that it's funny to watch my miss the ball every time (although it's partly to do with the fact that I can't jump and end up waving my legs like a madman while only lifting off about ten centimetres off the ground), but they like my on court theatrics. At Mastsue too I gained popularity by acting like a total dork and entertaining the masses, something I could never do in New Zealand if I tried. That evening, a few people from my team and I met up for a dinner of yakiniku (or what I like to call, “Freakin' cook it yourself” niku) which Maggie joined us for, and grilled the night away. Twas goood. Now that I think about it, there's been a drinking party every week with one group or another. The Japanese sure love their alcohol (even if it's highly diluted, it just mean's they drink more of it!).

Still on the topic of food tonight I went along to a dinner Maggie and I were invited to, which I originally thought was a meeting with someone from city hall accompanied by someone from the BOE. I had envisioned a rather formal event. Boy, was I wrong. We met up with Nishihara-san beforehand as we didn't know the way to the restaurant so I guessed at least she had been invited and we passed Kawahara-san on the way so that also counted him in. Great. The reassembly of the Rowdy Duo, that writes out formality. All four of us arrived at a small Chinese restaurant and occupied their only two tables as two others from the BOE joined us and the beers and nihonshu arrived. Kawahara-san managed to down his beer in 30 seconds and order more while I sipped my nihonshu as we waited for our guest to arrive. Noriko was the name of our guest from the city hall and she was the niece of one of the BOE staff who had spent several years at a university in Arizona. By the time she arrived I had lost count of the nihonshu that had float past me, each one seeming the break the laws of gravity more than the last and finally becoming airborne. Nishihara-san too was beyond recognition, her face a dark red ball moving ever closer to the recipient of her conversation before falling on their shoulder, with each round of shochu. The night was a lot of fun and the large number of cultural blunders I attempted could not be stopped as my alcohol tainted ears blocked out all cries of warning.

Kawahara-san, you so crazy!

It's peace time.

And Nishihara-san is horizontal already.

Even though all the tables in the izakaya had been taken over by us, other patrons would wander in from time to time to seat themselves at the bar. One such patron happened to be the son of my kyudo teacher who had heard of me. Needless to say at kyudo the next night I was welcomed with a “You went drinking last night, didn't you. I hear you can hold your liquor” followed by a complete recap what I did the night before as told to him by his son, for the rest of the kyudo members. From my point of view, the version of events went nothing like how he relayed it so I'll just disregard his version. Anyway somewhere within the 15 minute play-by-play recap I was challenged by the old kyudo master (who resembles Mr. Miyagi but with a longer beard, and is therefore wiser)to a drinking match sometime at the dojo using the kyudo clubs' ample supplies of sake, that they were quick to show me. This was brought on by the rest of the club wondering who could hold their liquor the longest knowing full well that the master was indeed a master at it. Tanoshimi da na.

Well You Can Ask Your Grandma If She Want A Coffee Lolly!

(From the 21st September).

I've got no internets. This blog is brought to you by boring days at the BoE and commandeering Maggie's computer when she's not around. The lack of Facebook and... Facebook has led me to take up other hobbies including getting outside and enjoying the sun typhoons. Yesterday I turned up for work at my most furtherest away school, Yoro only to find that school was on hold until confirmation that the storm we were currently in the middle of, had passed. That we were in a storm was news to me when I rocked up to the staffroom; the fact that I had just travelled an hour in the bus alongside a raging sea that was splashing onto the road and not realised something was out of the ordinary was more of a miracle. My supervisor had sent me a text saying not to go to school but I had only received it after I arrived. The principal however had anticipated this and had entertainment lined up for the few hours I would spend there which took the shape of a bamboo flute or shakuhachi. I blew on that massive freaking pipe for hours and couldn't produce a decent note, but I'll try over the next few days so when I return in a couple of weeks I can wow them with a rousing rendition of BAG on the shakuhachi.

Much has happened since my last post including much travel, dinners out, hangovered mornings, sporting highlights (and lowlights) and Rocky end montage re-enactments atop of shrine steps. Volleyball is still one of my weekly happenings but probably not for long. I haven't been for a couple of weeks after I seriously sprained my foot (again) and further weakened it while playing with the kids at Yura Kindergarten last week, so I haven't had much practise for the tournament I was forcefully entered into happening on Sunday. Kyudo is going spiffingly. I have made more progress in the four times I have been here than in the year I did it at Matsue North High. Last week I even got to fire at the long-range targets, something I was not allowed to do in Matsue. Soon I'll be allowed to get a hakama kimono uniform and start practising in earnest to compete in the Kyoto Area Competition next year. Rob, the high school AET has also joined despite saying it was too graceful for the likes of him. One of the reasons why I love doing kyudo here is that the main and vice teachers are some of the nicest, most patient people I have ever met. The main teacher looks like Mr. Miyagi and not only does he wax on, he waxes off, too. I'm still doing Chinese with Maggie, Masako and Shou-chan and soon my shamisen lessons will begin after Shou-chan organised talked to one of his friends who's a teacher. The future is looking busy. Thank goodness I only have to work for about four hours a day and have time to sleep plan lessons all afternoon ready for the nights activities.

One thing I have been indulging myself in too much recently is eating out. There are sooo many eating places in Miyazu, most being three table closet sized shops on the first floors of peoples houses, but the food is awesome. Every so often Keita invites us out to dinners at Azito, especially last week after Maggie and Rob decided to join the volleyball team, so I think the dinner was a ploy to get them to stay for good even though after one night Rob was adamant he was not coming back. That night it was we three Miyazu AETs, Keita and a primary school teacher who also played volleyball. I went through three bottles of sake, as per usual while the others drank beer. The day after this soiree I was summoned to the BoE by Nishihara-san after teaching my oh-so-tiring half-day at Miyazu Primary. She then proceeded to tell me about something she had just done that involved holding a sign and having a video taken of her to be put on the net. It just so happened I had to do the same, so here's a montage of people saying a word each. I'm the very last person and Maggie's in there, too. 

Anyway, at the place where this was filmed, which was a sake shop I happened to mention to Nishihara-san I had drunken some of the stuff I saw in the shop and had a hangover. The guy who was filming the clips for the website, whom I had never met in my life just turned to me, straight-faced and said “Yes, I know. I heard you last night.” The foreigner can't do anything in this town without everyone knowing about it. It just so happens that he had a night job of a cook at the Azito. But there has been a case of my students coming up to me saying, “My grandma heard from her friends' daughter that you bought coffee lollies at the supermarket on Sunday.” Seriously. That's how much privacy we have here.

This week is the week of long weekends. The long weekend we've just had consisted of three trains and two hangovers. The first day, Saturday, being a train to Fukuchiyama in the evening with Maggie, after Chinese. This was a necessary trip. We had to ascertain the resources in our area for future reference. Such references may include the urgent purchase of manga and figures, so we now have a plan in place. The train ride took just under 50 minutes and although Fukuchiyama isn't a big city, it has an electronics store and a few book stores. And a Book Off. When we walked to where Maggie remembered the Book Off was, we found it had packed up and moved, so we tracked it down across the other side of town. Not only had it moved, it had powered up to include a Hard Off. Lest to say our 30 minute walk across town was well worth it. 

Everyone was at Hard Off that night.

That night we had dinner at a really good ramen place that lets you get mass quantities of any one ingredient. I, of course, quadrupled up on the meat but others I saw had piles of spring onions and another resembled a black hole with sheets upon sheets of black nori (seaweed) piled around the edge of their bowl. The ramen was goooood. 

Long weekend day 2, Sunday saw Maggie and I travelling to an even further away city, Toyooka, by fancy train to meet up with the other female AETs in the area. First we went to the famous big clothing chain Uniqlo where I learned the Japanese etiquette of trying on clothes the oblivious foreigner way as I was scolded by a shopping assistant after wearing my shoes into the changing room. You have to take shoes off like you do in any carpet or tatami floored areas of any shop in Japan. We didn't do much more than eat after that, first at Baskin Robbins icecream parlour, then at a patisserie, and finally again at dinner at a Korean restaurant. This restaurant was so good and with the help of Sammi who lived in Korea for a year, we got some pretty amazing dishes. I tried [the whole bottle of] some Korean alcohol called sochu that tasted like really strong sake, which made me go flying on the train back to Miyazu. Interpret as you will.

"Hey I read that rice makes a good facial mask. Maggie wanna try?"

Sunday was a fun-filled day in the shopping metropolis of Miyazu as the female AETs reunited again for the nearly sole purpose of buying a present for another AET, Mario's birthday which will be tomorrow. We thought we could rustle up a Gundam kit in ten minutes from the local toy store but we ended up taking over an hour picking one he might like from the hundreds that were available. The store owner even gave us a discount after she heard it was for a birthday present. Apart from that, we went ¥100 ($2) shop shopping, where you can get the most awesome things for ¥100, then finally to the Dodgy Cowboy Place where they make yum banana crepes. I can't think of the real name for the place but their mascot is a dodgy looking cowboy so that's good enough. Their crepes are good but rarely do they have the supplies to make them, as was so this time. For the eight of us there were three plates of crepes brought out to us by the same ancient little woman with a humpback and bad eyesight who always serves us. Her eyes are so bad that whenever we pay we have to show her the buttons to press on the cash register. That night after everyone went home, Keita invited us out to a place we hadn't been to before but we knew of it and had seriously wanted to go and check it out despite thinking it was a pervy old man bar like the Fukusuke where we live. Maggie didn't come in the end but Keita invited one other girl from volleyball to come as well, someone of whom I had never really talked to. The three of us had a great time and my view of the place changed when I saw it wasn't a dodgy bar, but a very high-class Japanese restaurant. The girl who came too, Nomura-san I found was into the same stuff I like and was even a big Shinsengumi fan like myself, so sometime we plan to do a big Shinsengumi related trip to Kyoto.

We've done a few other things in the last month like going to the Kunda Junior High sports festival one Saturday a couple of weeks ago where Maggie was forced to participate in the PTA event which involved chucking balls in a bucket and a bowl strapped to the top of a bamboo pole with the rest of the teachers. 

Go Maggie!

I on the other hand was the victim of bitter old man foreigner rage at the event, having to endure an old fart kicking my back through the gap in the bench I was sitting on from behind. Maggie has several times been prosecuted by our Chinese teacher Ma-chan, an old Japanese man who has a grudge against Americans. He leaves me alone and is actually quite nice when he's not unabashedly stating his opinions on how Westerners can't do Japanese things like wear kimono because it won't suit them. There's a van that drives around Miyazu equipped with speakers on the outside, spewing out nationalistic anti-foreigner propaganda. Next time they come around I'll give them a warm welcome to the neighbourhood (seriously) and wave and smile at them. Maybe I'll give them a biscuit or two.

Those Who Don't Like Children Are Most Like Children.

I'm back at the BoE for the last time in several weeks so I'll take this opportunity to waste my time writing this blog.

Yesterday was my first day of school, my first classes being the Year 6s at Miyazu Primary. It went better than I thought it would. Two days before this Nishihara-san and I went to meet the head Year 6 teacher to discuss a lesson plan, which went fine and dandy with Nishihara-san there. As we were walking back to the BoE afterwards I mentioned that I had never really spoken to a children before. “Can I come to your first lesson?” was the surprising reply. Nishihara-san is usually so busy with her daily tasks and extra last minute tasks given to her on a daily basis (on Wednesday it was hornet extermination with another BoE worker at one of the junior high schools) that she doesn't have the time to do stuff like this. This could only mean that she was worried I would fudge it up. She may have also heard that I didn't have enough energy in my practice lesson I did at the Kyoto AET seminar in front of the other AETs (who had to act like typical Japanese kids). She had nothing to worry about as it turned out. The kids were all pumped up and I sort of fed off that energy so we had a great tine playing a guessing game for my introduction where I gave them two options for each question and they had to run to the side of the class that corresponded with the option they thought was correct. When I asked “How old am I?” with the options 23 and 34 most kids ran to the 34 side of the room, and when asked why, they said because you're tall. Going by that rate by the time I'm 30 I should be nearing 180cm, the future is looking bright (and tall). I had no trouble communicating with the teachers and the kids which was a relief so everything ran smoothly. Nishihara-san was at the back of my first of three classes, taking photos which I have yet to see. Before that I had to say an introduction speech at the morning assembly along with another new teacher and a new student. My one-page speech had to be shortened down to the bare essentials as requested by the principal so that made it easier for me.

After my last class it was lunchtime and here at the primary schools they have school lunches. School lunches are the bane or saviour of AETs dietary needs. These meals are made by the school cooks and are served by a chosen group from each classroom to all the students in the classroom. A large bowl of seaweed covered rice was placed in front of me (larger for me because they thought I needed it), along with a small bowl of miso, a plate of tempura vegetables (after realising a spoonful of cucumbers was served with it, I asked them to not dish it out to me) and a small carton of milk with a straw. I love Japanese cooking and am not too fussy about what I eat, so this cheap meal is a life-saver from the usual bought luch boxes I get on my BoE days that cost so much by the end of the week, and it's about the only time I get my veges. Other AETs who are fussy eaters usually hate school lunches and end up getting permission to bring their own lunches. In the clasroom we sat with our tables in a circle and I answered all their questions about schools in New Zealand and my hobbies as we ate.

It was strange to see how different the classes were even though all three classes I taught were Year 6 classes. It really depends on the homeroom teachers disposition and class size as to how the students are going to act. I luckily had very enthusiastic teachers and big classes of 25-30 students so the kids were pumping and curious, but I've heard not all of my teachers will be like that. Some are kind of quiet and some are totally uninterested in English so will not participate at all, making the kids uneasy and follow the teachers lead. Miyazu Primary is the biggest school I have with the biggest class sizes, but most of my schools are far away tiny rural schools with classes as small as two students going up to about eight students. It's also interesting that you can tell which are your special needs students almost as soon as you walk in the door. I had one girl hold on to my arm for the entire second class and

After lunch I went home (one of the perks of teaching at primary level, I only have half days unlike Maggie at the junior high schools who has to stay there all day regardless of whether she has classes or not) and I ended up sleeping all afternoon to be awoken by Maggie when she got home at 5pm. I'm guessing she had a slightly sour expression at my coming out bleary-eyed and tousled after enjoying a long nap while she had to sit at her school (I know I would) but my eyes weren't really open by this stage so I couldn't tell. She had gotten a message from Rob requesting a meet up for dinner so after watching some more Red Dead Redemption glitch videos on YouTube, where animals are placed by NPCs but with the programming for animal movements still applied (I recommend these videos for a good laugh, search 'Red Dead Redemption Bird Man') we headed off to our usual haunt, Tondaya, for dinner with Rob. Although we have eaten here several times for lunch this was the first time we had had dinner here and we were invited to sit at a table with couple of local guys enjoying a beer and some fresh fish. One of the guys had travelled extensively throughout Europe even though he didn't speak much English and shortly after we arrived another guy with long dyed blonde hair, joined their group. He had lived in Canada and Australia for several years but was too shy to talk to us so the other guys spoke for him. Rob and I both had shrimp tempura and rice while Maggie had the meat, rice and miso set we usually have for lunch. The guys who we were talking to offered us all beers but Maggie and I don't drink it so sat out that round content with coke and cream soda (with real cream!) as the guys spoke to us, complimenting Rob on his manliness the whole time. By the end of this the guys were so awestruck by Rob they asked him to come back and have a drink with them some time and shook his hand (and only his). Maggie guessed that they probably thought we were his bitches as a lot of the guys in town thought a previous JET Jared, who frequently was seen with both his girlfriend and my predecessor Kim, was their keeper.

On Monday I visited two other schools including the most furtherest to get to school, Yourou Primary which will take nearly an hour by bus and walking to get to. This time Nishihara-san drove us (in the mayors fancy new hybrid car, as the BoE car was in use – this car was so fancy, that everything was electronic and Nishihara-san had to spend at least five minutes trying to turn the car on) and as we ascended the hill that the school sat atop of we noticed a ute in front of us with the limb of a tree tried onto the back, extending well past the back of the utes tray. “Ah, that must be the principal!” Nishihara-san declared when she noticed the danger level of everything on the ute was reaching critical. When he reached the top of the hill and got out, wearing an old, stained tracksuit, he greeted us cheerfully and invited us in for tea. His name is Yamamoto-sensei and he is one of the most interesting folk I've met here, he tries to spend as much time as possible outside and gets the kids into gardening and outdoor activities. He also loves building things. As we left I noticed the jungle-gym in the playground had been rather crudely modified with a large limb of a tree bound to the top bars of the metal structure, extending precariously out beyond one side with a swing made of rope hanging down from it. It was clearly Yamamoto-sensei's handiwork, and when I mentioned it to Nishihara-san she said the BoE school inspectors frequently ask him to stop making dangerous playthings for the kids, but he ignores them and keeps doing it. Judging by the new tree limb he had acquired on the back of his ute, he had his mind set on modifying something else. I am prepared to be enlightened when I teach my first classes there next Monday.

Despite saying I was not going to do kyudo again on this trip to Japan, I surprisingly found myself at the local kyudo dojo on Wednesday night. This place is on the outskirts of Miyazu next to one of the loveliest parks in town famous for its cherry blossoms and autumn colours and as I sat watching the students practice (they are all about in their fifties or above, but there is a young boy who is just starting out), listening to the cicadas going berserk outside in the surrounding forest, I decided to take it up again. The dojo master is one of the most skilled in Kyoto Prefecture and his students frequently win competitions because he is strict on form – probably the most important aspect of the martial art, more so than actually hitting the target. The whole process of walking into the shooting area and notching the arrow on the bow takes a long time and is all measured and assessed. You must take three steps to walk to your position, sliding your feet along the floor so that they don't actually lift off from the floor, then you must lower yourself slowly to a kneeling position without bending your back while holding you bow straight up in the air, notch he arrow to it slowly, rise again straight-backed slowly, lift your bow above your head, pull down, line up your target then finally fire. Everything is measured. Time to do each position, footsteps taken and how long your stride should be, angles of your foot placement, distance from your head and shoulder your bow should be as you are doing the four steps of spreading your bow, etc. Because the students in my kyudo club at school wanted me to get to the stage of firing an arrow quickly they had me bypass all these form steps so I'm learning everything again from scratch so I don't miss anything and after a year and a half of going to all three lessons each week I should be at competition level. And I'll finally get a snazzy black hakama and white gi to wear.

So that has been the week so far. This is probably going to get posted at the same time as last weeks entry as I have no internet at home now because the routers being a dick, and I can only apply for internet of my own by using the internet. Argh! I don't think I have anything planned for this weekend as the Yourou Junior High sports festival I planned to accompany Maggie to is off due to a fast approaching typhoon, so I've been told to stay at home. I guess I should catch up on the cleaning as the tatami mats are getting dirty an the shower needs demoulding. Yay! *Kermit the Frog dance.* For the next two weeks I have classes everyday (shock horror!) so I probably won't update this for a while as my days will be filled with manic kids and long naps.

Back to Kyoto Whether I Want To Or Not

It was back to Kyoto for the second time in one week on Friday 26th, but this time it was minus the sightseeing and general fun with only myself to guide myself. Jen came with and drove to Miyazu from Ine (about 45 mins away) in time for the 6.55am train. It took just over two hours with one transfer in Fukuchiyama and with an hour to spare we made our way to the poky little, slightly seedy coffee shop we went to on Monday. The old lady who owned the place, who wore enough make-up to cover four girls a third of her age, remembered us and remembered the iced cocoa and cinnamon toast I had last time so I barely had to say anything before she disappeared through the cigarette smoke-filled archway into the kitchen, to emerge again several minutes later with sweat and make-up dripping off her face in a reverse Stars In Their Eyes transformation, carrying toast. We moved on to the orientation that was at the Prefectural Offices and while the seminar on Kansai Dialect was very interesting, the rest of it was boring and I fell asleep during the admin seminar. The only other interesting thing was a guy who from now on I am going to refer to as Pornstar-moustache Guy. This guy was a quintessential hick from the back blocks of America, and looked like he had just come out of Reno 911. At first I thought his mo was fake so as a joke I said “looking good!” On closer inspection I found it was indeed attached naturally and now he thinks I was hitting on him.

Several hours after the orientation we all met up for yakiniku in Sanjo at a place called Chijafa, which was awesome. We took the subway to Sanjo and followed the directions to get to Chijafa after we were assured “you can't miss it”. Indeed that was true. One could not miss the massive red signs and after we waited for the elevator to take us up (while watching the tv screen that displayed what was going on in the elevator at that time, a guy adjusting himself), we loaded in and got off at the eighth floor to file into a long black glass corridor dimly lit by red neon lights and looking terribly R18. We had arrived late so everything was in full swing when we arrived. Pornstar-moustache Guy was unfortunately already drunk by this stage, and thanks to the alcohol's influence, was overly excited to see his mistakenly not-so-secret admirer. It was a dizzying experience in the red-lit, BBQ smoke-filled, extremely loud private room at Chijafa, but the unlimited food was great and the free-flowing alcohol was enough to make this whole long trip worthwhile.

Korean BBQ or "cook it your freakin self."

Chijafa gets the Kansas thumbs up from Jen.

We took the 9.30pm train back to Miyazu and got back near midnight only to find that Jen needed petrol to get back to Ine and all the petrol stations in Miyazu had closed at 8pm. Keita luckily knew of a 24hr self-service station in some back block so I got Jen to drive to his 24hr fishing shop (yes, there are people who come to get fishing supplies at 3am) and ask him to draw a map. I knew all of the words and kanji for the touch screen at the pump, luckily, then we headed back to Miyazu watching the wildlife come out of their homes for the night including a stag and a turtle (who we nearly ran over).

The next day (Saturday 27th), Jen came back to Miyazu in the early afternoon to pick up Maggie and I for our trip to the in(famous) Ine for their fireworks night. Ine has a reputation of not being able to hold on to JETs for more than a year. It is one of the most beautiful places in Japan but it's also one of the most isolated rural areas in Japan. It is particularly difficult for Jen as she doesn't speak a lot of Japanese and nobody in her BoE speaks English. She only heard about the fireworks as a passing comment from one of her neighbours so she wasn't expecting too big a deal in such a small town. As we drove into Ine the bumper-to-bumper traffic opposed our minds eye of the scale of this event. Ine is a tiny fishing town famous for the funaya houses built over the water, along the bay that houses boats underneath while the family houses were upstairs. The sheltered bay prevents any waves from being blown into the houses so there are hundreds of these houses lining the entire bay.

Funaya in Ine. Ii~ ne.

The beauty of Ine marred by a big head.

Food stalls selling the local fare from local eateries were set up on one side of the bay while people flocked around the concreted thoroughfare or sat at the base of their funaya fishing.

People partying at their funaya.

Jen eats a bunyon cut off some old man's foot.

I shouldn't have asked to try some kakigouri.

Waiting for the big event.

The Ine fireworks were shorter than Miyazu's and unfortunately (or fortunately) lacked the hilarity of the advertising heavy metal guitar breaking peace and quiet, but hilarity did take the form of the traffic wardens who waved light sticks that resembled light sabres. Every time I passed one of them I had the overwhelming urge to go “whooom, whooom!” and whooom whooom I did, to the great annoyance of the traffic warden.

"Hey. Check it out, I've got two."
"Shut up."

That night we stayed at Jen's big, fancy, old people friendly house (it has call-out buttons in the toilet and bath in case you get stuck) and had a second dinner of yakisoba while watching the “Dear Reader” Harry Potter narration series on YouTube. Hilarity ensued one again. Then it was off to bed with the warning that the monkeys that come down from the mountains have been pretty active over the last couple of nights, and have been scratching on her screen door wanting in. We never did hear the monkeys and also appearances of the dreaded mukade (massive poisonous centipede) and gejigeji (hairy, fast, jumping millipede) were non-existent so it was an unusually safe night in the country for us.

The next day (Sunday 28th) we drove back to Miyazu early to join the NZ Association and some others who were interested in international relations for a touristy day around the Tango area in a touristy bus. Masako and Keita were the only others I knew but we met the other gaijin who live in Miyazu – Holly from Canada and Javier from Mexico, a couple who teach English at the local private English school. They weren't terribly exciting so I never really talked to them, but I did make friends with a mother who is a teacher aide at one of my schools, Kunda Primary, and her two children one, Waka, I will teach. Her English was very good.

First on the list of touristy stuff was soba making at at the old Tsutsuda elementary school. This school is one of many I passed that have been decommissioned and are used as community halls despite their obvious neglect. Here we used the gym (which had pealing wallpaper and extensive water damage) and set up tarpaulins on the floor with six wooden boards on top to use as work benches for the six groups we were split in to. My group had the mother and her two kids, a grumpy old lady who had done it many times before on these cultural trips and was acting like a bossy know-it-all, an old woman who was going to New Zealand with the NZ Society in November of whom I was told to teach English but she had no interest, and a overly shy teenage boy. We were given buckwheat flour and water and shown how to mix, knead and roll it, then finally cut it, which all took about 30 mins.

Keep on rollin, baby!

The pro shows us how it's done, after kicking me off.

After all the groups cut theirs up it was all sent to the kitchen where it was boiled and served with fish stock and spring onions for lunch. It was so good I went back for seconds and thirds, as the portions were Japanese sized.

"My onigiri! Mine!"

After that we headed to the bay for a boat ride to feed the seagulls shrimp chips. I can't think of a more less-deserving breed of bird to feed these chips to. I'm sure boxes of these things could be shipped to African countries to serve a better purpose, but luckily the bigger tombi hawks came into the picture and fought the seagulls for them. At first when the bags of chips were handed out I thought they were for us so Maggie turned the offer down and I set about to open them and eat my fill. I had no idea why people around me were saying “tabechatta, tabechatta” (you are [regretfully] eating them), as I had no qualms about eating the chips, they were good. Then I realised when people started chucking them out of the boat, it was not people food. I had the overwhelming urge to say “sutechatta, sutechatta” (you are [regretfully] wasting them).

Birdemic!

Funaya again, with fishing nets.

Finally, we jumped back on the bus and headed to the last port of call, an old, traditional sake brewery. Here we were told of the history of the brewery and of the brewing process, all in Japanese so I couldn't really understand much of it. Here we had tasters then were ushered into an ancient-looking upstairs room with many round tables dotted around it for afternoon tea. Here we were served the yummiest cakes I have had since Berry Cafe in Kyoto, with lashings of sake, Timmy. In fact I was lashed so hard with the sake I had trouble getting about unaided. It was the host's fault – he kept refilling my cup. Jen on the other hand couldn't drink a drop. The law here in Japan is zero tolerance for drink drivers, and even drinking one little drop is enough to have your licence suspended or be deported if you are a gaijin. But thankfully some nice person in the group bought Jen a whole bottle to drink when she got home. And then it was happy home time. I was a little happier than the rest.

Sake! Cake! Sake and cake! What more could you want?
Maggie agrees.

So that has been the haps for those three days. This blog post was brought to you by Maggie's food facials. Monday brings trips to some of my schools to meet the teachers, then I begin school on Thursday. My lazy days at the BoE will be short-lived.

Kyoto - Land of Shinsengumi and Humping Dogs

It's been a while since the last post but now I've actually done something of note it's worth mentioning. On Saturday Jen drove to Miyazu from Ine so we all could drive to the big smoke of Maizuru for some shopping. It was like Miyazu but a bit bigger so it was the same shops but just a tiny bit more. The best part of the night (apart from being lost and driving around in circles) was dinner. It was proper Indian food cooked by Indian cooks and I must say it was better than the stuff I got back in NZ. We had tandoori chicken and a curry and naan each. The biggest freaking naan I had ever seen mind you. We thought this an anomaly until we saw in Kyoto several days later this was the standard naan size in Japan because you don't have rice with your curry. Jen stayed the night and the next morning we jumped on the train for Kyoto for the AET seminar. It's a 2 ½ hour ride to Kyoto Station from Miyazu, at least on the cheaper service where you have to change over at the next biggest city in the area, Fukuchiyama. The orientation was to start on the Monday and finish on the Tuesday but we wanted to see some sights so Sunday morning before lunch we arrived in Kyoto only to find it was overcast, slightly raining and not worth the trouble of touring around outside. We did however sightsee around Yodobashi electronics store where Jen bought a fancy as phone, the huge mall Aeon which had a pet shop that sold meerkats, the four storey high second-hand book and music Book Off, and finally the anime holy-land Animate, where I managed to pick up a Animate exclusive figure I had wanted for ages and thought it was deemed out of stock.

That night we ate in Karawamachi, a lot of which is a huge labyrinth of covered shopping streets housing souvenir shops and eating places and is crowded most of the time. We ate at a place Maggie recommended called Ganko which despite having the face of a grumpy old man as their logo, was actually one of the best places I've ever eaten with such friendly, charismatic staff. We were seated along the bar with our own chef in front of us cutting up the fish we ordered before giving it to the kimono-clad wait staff to add the other food. Jen and I had a tuna sashimi and tempura set, while Maggie had tuna sushi and sukiyaki. 

Getting our tabe on at Ganko, Kawara-machi

Our chef was a really nice guy who kept on giving us free food and lollipops that were shaped like sushi, while we talked throughout the evening. His claim to fame (as he was very proud to point out) was the photo of him and the head chef cooking in the first few pages of the Lonely Planet Guide To Japan (which I will buy and get them to sign it next time I come back!). The head chef was awesome, too. He would come over when his patron didn't need him and talk to us, whipping out his notebook which had sentences concerning food in every language imaginable, as told to him by his international customers throughout the six years he had been working there and entertaining us with such food phrases as in Italian, Finnish and German.

The head chef of Ganko.
World famous from the Lonely Planet Guide to Japan!

The seminar itself was pretty boring as I knew it would be. On Monday we heard old JETs talk about their daily lives and we had them go over our introduction lessons for our first day at our schools while on Tuesday we actually presented our introduction lesson and it thankfully only lasted the morning. On the Monday night we all went to a drink and food buffet on top the of the Kyoto Tower Hotel where Maggie and I were staying at. The food was pretty average but everyone was there to take advantage of the all you can drink weak-ass Japanese beer and chateau cardboard wine. It was crowded at the open air buffet and more people came in the JET group then there were seats to carry them, so when Maggie and I arrived an hour late after making yet another trip to Animate, we had to split up and commandeer unsuspecting peoples chairs, which led me to the old Kyoto City JETs end of the table. If I had the choice I would have relinquished the honour of sitting with this hardened, pessimistic, dirty minded group of old gold-diggers and gays but as it happened, I had to sit through their unsavoury tales of waxing and promiscuity for an hour while I ate bad Chinese food and no dessert. Maggie and I planned to use the free admission tickets to the top of the tower that we got when we checked in but we were too late.

On Tuesday afternoon Maggie and I met up with Rob and the three of us took the train to Fushimi Inari, a famous group of shrines on a mountain that are connected with forest paths lined with giant red torii gates. After seeing it in the pictures I had imagined that it was only one shrine and at the most would have 100 or so torii surrounding it, but the kilometres of paths running through and around the mountain leading to the ten shrines really took me by surprise. At the base of the mountain shops sold mini toriis that you could buy and write your wishes upon to place at any of the shrines along the way. We wanted to buy one just for the cute factor but by the time we found our way back to the shops, everything was closed. As we ascended the mountain, we saw a small snack shop further along at the halfway point, and we half-stumbled half-dragged ourselves up the stairs towards it, red-faced and sweating from every pore, we found ourselves staring like soon-to-be road kill into the very large lens of a movie camera. It just so happened that a film crew was doing a time-lapse scene of Kyoto City from the mountain through the the evening. At the snack shop we had shaved ice and drinks while Maggie nursed her gunshot-looking mosquito bites after she asked one of the women from the film crew for some ointment and repellent. I didn't find the walk hard but I did have to stop and wait for the others often so I guess it was trying for people of average fitness level (mum check it, I'm above average). We climbed on and reached the very top to be greeted by the slamming of snack store sliding doors and weary, wrinkled old faces looking disapprovingly out from the glass windows, and it was only after we began descending we realised that we had reached to the top – there was no other indication of our achievement. As we wound our way to the heart of the mountain the torii overhead blocked out the little light of dusk left filtering through the thick forest. About this time we met a tiny old woman with one of the thickest Kansai dialects I had ever heard and for the rest of the descent she chattered away happily to the big gaijin as we tried to catch on to the tenuous threads of understandable Japanese amongst the heavy Kansai dialect. She led us down different paths to the station while talking about old ladyish things (like her late husband) before showing us to the station and parting ways.

That night the three of us took the 7.30pm train back to Miyazu, arriving at 9.30pm covered in dried sweat and exhausted. The feeling was multiplied for me knowing that I would have to make the long trip back to Kyoto again three days later. That's tomorrow. And it's going to be an early start. I'm not looking forward to it.

Obon Voyage!

The night before last we Miyazu JETs met up with the other Tango JETs for the final night of Obon – the fireworks! We started off on top of the Fukusuke getting our yukatas on without the help of a Japanese person, so it took twice as long. I couldn't get mine on no matter what I did so I ditched it in the end (which I'm glad I did) as it's really big and difficult to put on neatly, as I noticed Masako had trouble the night before. I also had a real obi to contend with unlike the others that had “one-touch obi” as Masako calls them, pre-tied obi that just clips onto the back of the a sash that just wraps around the waist. We had planned last week that we would all meet up, get ready and be outside Mipple to get a good seat by 5.30pm but even though most everyone who was to wear a yukata turned up early, we still arrived at the festival unfashionably late. All along the waterfront eight or so versions of the same six stalls were dotted around in a single line selling yakisoba (grilled noodles), takoyaki (dough-balls with octopus, my favourite – I had two boxes!), yakitori (grilled chicken), kakegouri (shaved ice), and Doraemon themed castella (a Portuguese cake that is very popular here and has been since the opening of the country to the outside world in 1868 – minus the Doraemon).

It was getting dark and the heavy clouds that had hung around all afternoon blotted out what little daylight was left as we wove our way through the thronging crowd who were idling around the food stalls. We actually managed to get a good place to lay our gouzu tatami mats out on grass, after walking further around the bay. Some unlucky latecomers were forced to sit on the paved areas, while others had to stand. It seemed like everyone in the city and the neighbouring towns was there as, as far as the eye could see along the bay all the way to Amanohashidate, people gathered with their mats and umbrellas anticipating the coming rain. Others met up with us shortly after and after getting dinner we settled in ready to watch the first part of the night, the lantern lighting. Already the six professional teams of Odori dancers were out on the water on covered raft-like boats dancing in time to the music playing from the loud speakers attached to the awnings of the boats, and when the clock struck 7.30pm the dancers stopped and began placing red and white lanterns on the water that drifted off away from the shore in a long wave, as the sound of a Buddhist monk chanting in an eerie monotone into a microphone echoed around the bay. These lanterns each contained a letter written by someone in Miyazu to a dead loved-one and it's thought that eventually the water would carry the letter to the recipient. Small shrines covered in flowers and ornaments were also set on the water, then set alight as they sombrely followed the lanterns further out so sea before burning up completely, their charred remains slipping silently beneath the waves.

The state of inner peace we had all ascended to was abruptly dashed as the first firework was sent up and exploded with an almighty bang that scared all children, animals and Maggies within the vicinity and set off car alarms. The fireworks lasted one hour and every 10 to 15 minutes the silence on the ground was broken by sudden shrill heavy metal guitar music being blasted out over the loud speakers as the commercial break started and the companies that had sponsored the event were announced, the music was so out of place and so startling that we couldn't stop laughing every time it started up. Towards the end of the fireworks it started to spit and as soon as they ended at 9.00pm the rain just came down after trying to hold it in all evening. We stuck around despite the rain and met up with more JETs from the area who had arrived just towards the end, and went to see and take part in the odori again, teaching it to the others. By that night I was a pro at the Miyazu Odori dance as it was the third night of doing it, but this night it was more fun as it was haphazardly danced by fewer people, many of whom hadn't done it before while most people were wearing their wet weather gear that included ponchos with frog head hoods. One couple we did see did the entire thing in motorcycle helmets that had microphones attached to them, it was all pretty bizarre. The rain had eased a little for the odori but as we finished it just bucketed down. I luckily had my umbrella with me but many of the JETs hadn't brought anything to protect them from the elements so were soaked to the bone. They seemed pretty happy about it, but then again they had been drinking. We hung around for a little while at Mipple waiting for the rain to ease but there was no end in sight so we split off to go home.

That was one experience to add to the true Miyazu experiences list – Obon in the rain. It was probably most memorable and more fun because it was rained, but it was definitely a great night. Today however I'm going to buy a cellphone with Maggie and Nishihara-san and tonight is volleyball. Saturday is Maggie, Jen, and my trip to Maizuru, one of the nearest bigger cities, then on Sunday all three of us will take the train to Kyoto, a day earlier before Kyoto Orientation starts to do the tourist thing. At the moment Maggie and I are looking at places to eat in Kyoto and the Ninja Restaurant looks pretty appealing. The wait-staff are dressed as ninjas and they drop down from the ceiling to give you your food apparently. We watched a video of it on YouTube and if you have something that is to be flamboyed they attach a fuse to it and light it making it set on fire briefly. An obvious choice for a restaurant.